Washington, D.C.
The world of science was shocked yesterday by the tragic loss of famed University of Putra Adjunct Professor of Giant Clam studies 'Willie' Wei-Hock Soon, who vanished in the gravitational collapse of a Heartland Conference focus group into a relativistic Einstein ring.
The implosion was triggered by an infall of dark money into the gravitational field of a table piled high with press releases, driving the P-R hack's ironic mass past the 'Pachauri Limit', and releasing a shower of the internet quanta called 'Higgs Moncktons' or ' Blog Particles,' created when factoids propagate faster than the speed of light.
As Congressional leaders directed FEMA aid to the families of lobbyists missing in the catastrophe, string theorists said the exotic new particles must have instantly decayed into indetectible "Dark Money" antiphotons by 501c annihilation at the event horizon.
"The collapse of the gravitas field suggests a Monckton to me" Heartland Science Director & convicted EPA fraudster Jay Lehr PhD told Fox News. " If you want more on the red ink shift and the breakdown of congressional supersymmetry, it's gonna cost you."
The world of science was shocked yesterday by the tragic loss of famed University of Putra Adjunct Professor of Giant Clam studies 'Willie' Wei-Hock Soon, who vanished in the gravitational collapse of a Heartland Conference focus group into a relativistic Einstein ring.
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| Photo of U. of Putra Adjunct Prof. Soon taken seconds before the catastrophe |
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| Last recorded image of Soon imploding into the spin zone |
As Congressional leaders directed FEMA aid to the families of lobbyists missing in the catastrophe, string theorists said the exotic new particles must have instantly decayed into indetectible "Dark Money" antiphotons by 501c annihilation at the event horizon.
"The collapse of the gravitas field suggests a Monckton to me" Heartland Science Director & convicted EPA fraudster Jay Lehr PhD told Fox News. " If you want more on the red ink shift and the breakdown of congressional supersymmetry, it's gonna cost you."
